Taming Dark Europe

I was born in Africa and many times people from abroad treats me as if I am a little backward. However, sometimes people from first world countries are not exactly developed either.

We have experienced people from a certain country in Western Europe who don’t flush toilet paper – let me spare you the gory details. Yet we here in Africa have a duty to civilise and domesticate some parts of that dark continent.

Logic fails them, as we can see from some decisions made by Angela Merkel. An an almost uncannily familiar way, she sometimes seems to speak and think later.

Or the stupidity of people scrapping the Mercedes-Benz G300 Professional as it will eat holes in the ozone layer, only to appear on the market with monstrosities sporting six wheels and twelve cylinders. Or eight with so much power it can reverse the earth’s rotation, yet no realistic tank range or any use for the three diff-locks that can be engaged while in motion. No concern for carbon footprints, eh?

Same and their neighbours also build most capable 4×4’s that can just about traverse any terrain. Until it gets a flat, that is. No spare tire, yet they sell it in Africa! Or insist upon the mostly unavailable LSD (low sulphur Diesel.) They forget about the Mercedes G-something Landaulette.

Yesterday, one of these superior intellectual beings walked into the default coffee shop, wielding a very smart smartphone. “Oh,” he said, “it was difficult finding this place.”

When I asked him why he did not use GoogleMaps, he said it wasn’t on there. So I told him that I had put it there myself and that, just a few minutes prior, I had my weekly report from GoogleMaps showing that over ten thousand people had visited the coffee shop’s listing over the past week.

His answer was that “I have taken a photo of the street now, so I will find it next time.”

Welcome to Enlightened Africa, man with shiny skin from north! Luckily I was born African which gives me an advantage – we know how to find our way, we also can understand and use technology better than some.

Perhaps this is why the engine management software for the top cars from his very dark continent is continent gets developed here in South Africa. We did not participate in the Middle Ages, after all.

If GoogleMaps is too hard to use, how does he order food in a restaurant? Or does he choose his burger and a plastic toy from a picture?


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